Tuesday, October 16, 2012

I heard a conversation much like this tonight:

Dad: We need to talk about what you have been doing for the last 4 years in college. I spend 5 trillion dollars and you told me you were going to get a degree in engineering! The summer before your Freshman year you had these grand plans for getting a Doctorate in 4 years.  And now you tell me all you have is a lousy degree in Native American cave drawing interpretation?!! You call that success? 

Son: Yeah, I have been really working hard you know, lots of headwinds the first few years and am kinda getting in my groove now. I think in 4 more years I just might have more progress.  My gpa has finally come up 0.1 from where it was.  Besides that you don't care about my girlfriend's [healthcare].

Dad: What are you talking about?  Why is your girlfriend's [healthcare] my responsibility?  You know I don't believe in those methods.  You have messed around long enough, it is time to go do something different.  You obviously are not cut out for this.  I finished college and got 3 degrees and made $100 millions, and thousands of people have jobs now because of my work. 

Son: A bunch of rich people that didn't pay their fair share! Probably took advantage of people that didn't look like them.  I have this plan now to go 4 more years and go for that Doctorate again. I'm getting a feel for it now. Why don't you want me to succeed?  You know I didn't have that great of grades in High School, it was a tremendous uphill battle.  Lots of people not following the rules in the previous classes.  People were trying to hold me back. Aaaaaand there aren't enough teachers in this school I want to have more teachers in education. 

Dad: I thought we were talking about you fooling around for 4 years and having nothing to show for it, what is this about teachers? Why don't you get a job and help pay for some of your ideas?  I'm tired of supporting you and your friends and not getting any results.  And besides all that what about that big wreck you had in my car a while back? Who was responsible? For two weeks you said it was just a freak accident where the parking brake didn't hold. Now I'm hearing reports you were asleep at the wheel. Which was it? 

Son: That is not fair, I cared about your car very much. I would never use a wreck as a tool to extort more money from you for 4 more years. I am bound and determined to find out who was driving that car when they went asleep. Besides that you just assumed since I was borrowing it I was responsible and you started yelling about it.
Dad: When you called me about the wreck the first thing you said was you did not know for sure what happened. You said it was a freak accident! Now you are admitting it was a wreck and somebody went to sleep? 

Son: That is a lie.  I said I did not know at first, but it had something to do with the brake.  And I am determined to find out who did not push the brake when they should have.  And I told you that from day one.  Mom? Mom? Can you help me talk some sense into this guy?

Mom: Well Dad, actually he did say something about the brake when he called.  I heard him.  

Dad: So are you wanting to set the record straight right now?

Son: I will say it again, I will find out who was sitting in the driver's seat when the accident involving the brake happened.  Mom? Mom? See what I have to deal with?  Why do you want to deport my friend Pedro?  He got a degree in engineering in 4 years, and is working a good job now.  Why is it your policy to keep him down?

Dad: (slaps his forehead)


  1. I'm glad I watched the debate or this would not have been near as funny! Ha ha

  2. I DID NOT watch the debate, but I get the gist anyway.